I was reading this morning in Judges chapter 20 and noticed something interesting. The nation of Israel rose up against the tribe of Benjamin because of the evil things that the people of the city of Gibeah had done. The army went to God to ask who should fight, and God sent the tribe of Judah. They went up to fight and lost 22,000 men that day. Then Israel went back before God, wept and asked Him what to do,  and the Lord said, “Go up against them.” So they went up against them a second time and lost another 18,000 men that day. The army went and wept before the Lord a second time and asked Him what to do, and God said, “Go up, for tomorrow I will give them into your hand.” And the next day, Israel defeated the tribe of Benjamin.

It seems very intersting to me that Israel failed miserably, twice, before God gave them a decisive victory. I don’t think that Israel was impetuous is going out the first two times, after all, they sought God’s direction each time and the did what He commanded each time. I don’t think they went out with the wrong motives or in sin. So, that begs the question, why did that have to fail to badly twice before God handed them the win.

I can think of a lot of reasons that God might have done this. First, having been beaten twice already, no one could say that Israel won by its own strength, so the victory was God’s not Israel’s. Also, it could be that God needed to first humble Israel before raising her to victory. Either way, the point is that Justice was administered and God was honored for the victory.

This makes me think about the battles that I face. I think that too often I expect God to just step in and knock down the obstacles that I face, just because I’m on His side. But, when I look at this passage what I begin to realize is that even though I’m doing God’s work, this is also a time that God is using to do something to me and in me. He is using this time to humble me, to take away my pride and arrogance, and to draw me to Himself.

There are battles that I go into expecting to win, but instead God turns my world upside down so that I can better learn to rely on Him. And, even though that is hard to accept when I feel like I’m losing the battle, I know that sometimes losing a battle is the only way to prepare to win the war.

So, if you are feeling beat down, tired, and just generally unmotivated, know this; God wants to use you, and if you will allow the loss that you are experiencing to draw you closer to Him, then ultimately He can use you to do much greater things.

Any thoughts?

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